Flower Friday

My Amaryllis has been in beautiful bloom since January. Unfortunately, this year, I forgot to stake the stalk and with four large flower heads, it snapped in the middle of the night. Since the tree in our front yard is blooming, I just improvised an arrangement that now adorns my desk at work.

This weekend we head out of town for my nieces' Quinceanera. It should be a blast! I've never been to one so I'm looking forward to it. My brother is also coming into town from California and it's always nice to see him. After a busy birthday weekend and a busy weekend before that, I'm also looking forward to next weekend where we do absolutely nothing. I need rest!

Happy Birthday to Me

Happy Birthday to me! My husband took me to an amazing dinner, my sister bought me cute purse, my lovelies (pictured) went bowling and proceeded to sugar me up with tasty morsels and then beat me, and anonymous giver my brother sent me a camera! I should also mention a gift card to the trendy clothing store, the obnoxiously large birthday ballon (which suits me perfectly!), the beautiful linen towel with rose embroidery, a sweet little vase (by husband), the very strange zebra pillow my mother sewed me (???), and the movie [questionable] watching + slumber party with the couple who never seems to tire of us sleeping in their guest room. Lunch at my boss' home and a card featuring a pig (nod to my love of sausage). Getting older never felt so good :p

Venting, because I can

Since this is my blog, I get to say what I want. And since this isn't your blog, if you don't like what I write, you can stop reading immediately. This is a brilliant arrangement :)

I keep making this mistake. I read links from Facebook. Frequently. From those multiple articles emerge a snapshot of cultural trends particular to my sub-cultural (which is mostly white, middle class, and religious). I'm honest enough to admit this. Some of those trends are ridiculous and I get all riled up (because I'm reactionary like 65% of the general populace). And because I have a blog - I go vent all my riled-ness. 

You've been forewarned. 

My latest beef is with posts by mothers. I'm not a mother. [You have every right to stop reading now] I keep running across all these blogs that say if your house is messy, good for you. If it's super clean and you have kids, then you must be a horrible parent. Whatever. Basically, it goes like this: every woman is different. They have difference strengths and different weaknesses. Some are good at decorating, some are good at cleaning, some are good at baking, some are good at crafts, some are good at being funny, some are good at discipline, some are good at sleeping, some are good at blogging, some are good at looking showered. If you can't be friends with a mom that has a clean house, then you're just insecure. The same thing goes for women who think good decorators must be materialistic or people who have maids are selfish or moms who wear pjs all day are lazy. I'm sure she's bad at something you're good at. I'm sure you're good at something she's bad at. Where did this epidemic of insecurity come from anyway? Our identity is in Christ [beautiful, beloved, chosen, etc].

It seems that women are suddenly bad at being friends with other women who do things differently. From decorating to dating to parenting to money handling to working. There are a gazillion ways to be different and a gazillion details in life with an equal gazillions ways to approach them. Some of those ways are good, some of those ways are bad. Every woman in the world succeeds and fails. Our identity is not in how we approach those things - it is in Christ.

I'm sure mothers need encouragement. I know that my sister does. But it's pretty hollow encouragement to only have your house-cleaning or house-messy skills validated. Such encouragement focuses on the wrong thing and at the very least should be coupled with encourage of a more eternal kind. Like your identity in Christ.

Part 2, advice giving. Proverbs says wounds from a friend can be trusted. Let's not crucify our friends for suggesting we do things differently. Maybe they're judging us - maybe they're not judging us. Maybe they misunderstand us - maybe we misunderstand them. Maybe they're right. Maybe they're wrong. Taken in light of eternity, getting hung up on all this is a waste of time. It's almost like people forget they are human and all their friends are human too. Oh, and the people who think they're wrong are also human. Our identity is in Christ.

Hug someone and move on.*

The end.

*p.s. if you can't move on - get some counseling - I've personally found it to be very helpful. Plus, it's an extra person to hug you. :D

p.p.s. And if you just particularly struggle with insecurity - let's be friends. You were made by God - so you've already met my basic criteria for friendship. :D

Wasting away February

It has been almost a full month since I last posted. I'm sorry but there's not much to tell. The weather has been schizophrenic, alternating between fierce cold (in Texas terms) and weird warmth. The constant fluctuation puts me and hubby down in the dumps. I don't mind the cold per se but it is hard to be productive. We don't do much beyond our basic daily duties: work, eat, sleep, repeat. If you're like me, bidding time until the sun returns, I have a recommendation for you below.

Certain movies pull at me during certain months of the year. My mid-winter movie is The Lake House. I really love this movie and can't understand why it isn't more popular. Perhaps because the tempo is slow and audiences can't appreciate thoughtfulness and consideration? Perhaps because it's clean and audiences need shallow kissy-scenes and tense sequences of inappropriate language or conflict? Perhaps because audiences only embrace implausibility when it comes to explosions and romantic relationships?

Let me enumerate the reasons I adore this movie: 

1. They write letters! I could stop there. Really, I could.

2. It's clean! They get to know each other through letters, which demonstrates the ability to have a meaningful relationship without all that physical contact. Just because our world has forgotten how to do relate without touching doesn't mean it isn't possible. There's one line when Alex says to his brother, "She was more real to me than all of that." I really love that line.

3. Their relationship develops within the context of family. I hate it when you're watching a movie about two people falling in love and you don't even know if they have siblings. Relationships happen within a context, not a vacuum. In this movie, you meet Kate's mom and understand the dynamics of her parent's marriage You meet Alex's father and brother and understand the dynamics of his parent's marriage. I love that. That is actual plausibility.

4. Lots of critics say the acting falls flat. But that's because the world rewards extroversion. The acting is a brilliant portrayal through subtlety of thoughtful and serious personalities. Quiet people exist and fall in love too, ya know.

5. There is beautiful music and cool architectural references.

6. Their letters time-travel. They do not. This is an important distinction to understand the plot. I don't mind this because it's a way to write a modern version of Jane Austen's Persuasion. Which is all about waiting. And not waiting because you're stupid and are following "destiny" or made really bad decisions [e.g. those really annoying waiting movies like the notebook and serendipity - both of which gag me]. This is romantic waiting done right.

7. Last, but not least, the twist at the end. Every time it happens, I think again about how brilliant it is. The time-travel thing is already something to swallow and it could get messy. Yet, the story is wrapped up beautifully without becoming overly complicated. You wonder how they'll ever meet and the twist is so simple, so brilliant, I love it!

caveat - there is some kissy-ness at the end. Sorry. I never said it was a perfect movie.