I would like to be the type of person who lets things roll off her back. But sometimes, I just can't do it. There's enough evil and pain in the world that it always surprises me when someone would choose to take advantage of my strength by assaulting me with the reality of life (as if I weren't already acutely aware of it).
I know that I wrote awhile back that I longed for kindness and that is still true. I think it hurts me even more, though, when I think someone is kind and then they do something completely unclassy and jerky. I know no one is perfect and I wish I could be perfect in my response, knowing the right balance between forgiveness and a healthy "no way buster!". But I'm not, I'm confused and on the edge of being just as wrong in my response as they were in their assault. I received some unnecessary roughness tonight from a friend (not just mentally but physically) and it's made me more sad than I expected.
I know that I wrote awhile back that I longed for kindness and that is still true. I think it hurts me even more, though, when I think someone is kind and then they do something completely unclassy and jerky. I know no one is perfect and I wish I could be perfect in my response, knowing the right balance between forgiveness and a healthy "no way buster!". But I'm not, I'm confused and on the edge of being just as wrong in my response as they were in their assault. I received some unnecessary roughness tonight from a friend (not just mentally but physically) and it's made me more sad than I expected.
2 comments:
Yea!! I like blogging friends. You're on my list! Here's the thing, you typically compose much more insightful and thoughful posts than I do - consider yourself advised. =-) !!!
Becca
Here's the thing, we're SUPER blessed we have only a mortgage in debt. But we've worked REALLY hard to have only a house loan. Now we're looking at school for me and it's getting to where we have to make serious decisions about taking out an education loan for me to finish my degree. It's a tough decision. David sees it as an investment, which it is, it's just DEBT!!! Ya know??? =-)
Also, I've thought alot about how people tease. I'm just as guilty as the next guy, don't get me wrong, but why is it that people find it easier to pick on someone in the name of a joke than to be kind? It's one of those crazy things. And it'd only take about 5 seconds to think something through before saying it and causing pain. I'm glad someone is willing to be vulnerable and blog about such things.
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